Start 'Em Young

When Aerie and I first moved to Austin, my mother advised her to "take a class in Texas History. It explains a lot." And it does. Texas was a sovereign nation, you know. That's why we don't care what the rest of you think.

Since Thumper's a native Texan, I thought I should indoctrinate him early in the history and culture of God's Favorite State in God's Favorite Nation, so today we went to the Bob Bullock Texas State History Museum. Since cheapness counts, I'm not proud to say this trip cost us $8.50, including meter parking. Not our most frugal afternoon foray, but it was for the good of his Texan soul.


"Where's the star, Thumper? Where's the star? Go get the star!"

Moments after that photo was taken, he tripped and sprawled out flat. Two women walking by gasped and asked him if he was OK. The man they were with said, "Aw, he's OK. He does it all the time. You can tell by that scab on his chin."

Surprisingly, a history museum wasn't the best choice for a 17-month-old. It was dark and somber, and sparsely populated on a Wednesday afternoon. Plus, they don't allow photography in the exhibit areas, which is kind of a buzz kill when you're hanging out with a photogenic toddler. So we decided to hoof it over to the Capitol and play on the grounds instead.



It took awhile to get him to move on from watching the landscapers. "Doo Nie?" he asked over and over again. That's Thumperish for "What are they doing?" "They're trimming bushes," I said. "Booses. Doo Nie?" "They're trimming bushes." "Booses. Doo Nie?"



The cannon was almost as interesting as the landscapers. Almost.



There were lots of folks in matching green t-shirts that said "I Support" some damn thing or other. So I explained to him how the legislature was currently in session and that a lot of the people on the grounds were there to demonstrate, protest, or lobby their legislators. He headed right up the steps to see about addressing the legislature himself.



Lobbying is hard work, so we sat down in the grass for awhile and had a snack.



Which attracted a few squirrels. They must have been Democrats, always looking for handouts. Ha! Just kidding. They were actually registered independent.



He pointed at the dome and said, "Ball." I said, "Capitol." "Ball." "Capitol." "Ball." Just then a young man walked by, overheard, and said, "Well, it does sort of look like a ball. Ball!" And Thumper said, "Capew!" That's my boy: always the contrarian.

Weekend in Review

What a weekend. The entire family, even the Florida branch, got together to celebrate the birthday of the Matriarch Formerly Known as Purelight. The last time we all got together, there were sixteen of us. There were eighteen this time. We stayed at Great Wolf Lodge and had Birthday Dinner at Riverwalk Cafe at another giant resort right across the street.

It was great seeing the whole family and meeting or getting to know better some of the new additions. I think I missed some good conversations because of chasing Thumper around, but as Mom said in her birthday night speech, we're all connected not just to her but to each other. Renewed contact keeps those connections live, and I'm glad we (almost) all made it. Thanks badkitty812, Pirate71, and all you other non-commenting family lurkers, and even *gasp* non-blog-reading family members. It was good reconnecting.

And now of course, returning to my narrow focus: this Thumper kid amazes me. I fret and worry about things like the long drives to and from, and the sleeping in the hotel room, and the missing of naps, the staying up late, etc. etc., and he handles it all with grace, charm, humor, and patience. He loved nearly every minute in the pool, in the lobby, in the hallways, playing with his cousins, his aunts and uncles, his grandparents, perfect strangers, the guy vacuuming the lobby in the morning.



We made him skip a nap the day of the drive to the resort so that he'd sleep most of the 3 1/2 hours, but he only slept one hour and spent the rest of the time playing and chatting and singing. He did the same on the drive home again. I can't figure out how we got so lucky with this kid. Part of me wants to take credit, saying that it's because we did the right thing having a stay-at-home parent for him and giving him a solid schedule that makes him secure enough to be able to deviate from it now and again. But really, I think we're just lucky. Sometimes I get weird, paranoid twinges when I think about how wonderful he is, and I think of parents of children murdered or killed by horrible diseases. They always say what a joy the child was, what a spark, how he brought light into the world. And I think he's too perfect, he can't last, I'll lose him. What can I say, I've got a dark side. The kid is unbelievable in a way I can't believe I deserve.

And lastly, I have to just mention this: I went to bed before 10 o'clock last night. I know, that makes me officially an old fart, but it was a tiring weekend. So I was about as dead asleep as I could be when Aerie decided to come to bed around 11:30. I woke to her cuddled up against me, softly kissing me. She whispered, "I need you to come listen to something." So I dragged myself back up to consciousness and tried to pay attention. She told me that when she turned off the living room light, an alarm went off. She couldn't figure out what it was. It sounded sort of like the UPS on the computer, but not quite, and she was afraid the house was going to burn down. We went out to the living room. She turned the light off, and sure enough, there was a strange sound. I staggered back toward the bedroom.

"It's the puzzle," I said.

Gummas and Gumpa got Thumper a Melissa & Doug Vehicles Sound Puzzle for Christmas. A sensor (apparently a light sensor) knows when a piece is placed, and it makes a sound. The cruise ship piece was askew, and when Aerie turned off the light, it fired off the ship's foghorn, convincing Aerie that danger was imminent.

When she came back to bed, she was giggling hysterically. She apologized for waking me. And then she made it worth my while.

Oh, Bad, Bad, Daddy

He was sitting in the jogging stroller, trying to figure out how to work the seat belt. He was happy. I thought, "I'll just check my email, then get him ready for his nap." So I check my email. And I tweet about the boy: "Back from a jog, and the boy is currently trying like hell to strap himself back into the stroller. That he tried like hell to get out of."

Then I turned around to see him standing up in the stroller. It slowly tipped back, and down he went, face first. He jumped right up. As I went to him, he clearly, calmly said, "God dammip."

Then he started crying. And I saw the blood.



I'm pretty sure this springy thing on the brake handle is what did the deed.



Yep, I'd say that was definitely it.



So, yeah. I'm going for Father of the Year. While my son played on something he shouldn't, I tweeted about him playing on it. And when he hurt himself, I took pictures of it for my blog. I've marred his perfect little face forever. Chicks dig scars, though, right?

Let's just tell Aerie he fell at the playground today, shall we? Thanks; I owe you one.

Greatly Enjoying My Keyword Activity

My favorites:

attitudes to househusbands
domesticated househusband
i love harley so much that i cant bare to be without him right now
strong women househusband sexuality
gender restructuring househusband
gay househusband
female head of household househusband
how fast does the earth spin

The Color Fuschia

There's a fly in the house. Watching Thumper try to track it as it flew was fairly amusing. But then he spent several minutes waving and saying, "Hi! Hi, pie! Hi! Hi!" when it landed and "Bye! Bye bye! Bye, pie!" when it took off again. God, I love that kid.

So anyway, I told Aerie I would have to blog about how sexist she is. She said I'd have to include her "in my defense" point, though.

Yesterday, Thumper and I went to Austin Baby!, which is the hippiest of stores in the hippiest of Austin neighborhoods. It makes me feel a little funny inside. I mean, not only am I a man invading a nurturing and supportive maternity/breastfeeding outpost, but I'm driving in from the suburbs to do it. I don't feel warmly welcomed there, at least not until I make it clear I'm there to spend hundreds of dollars on cloth diapers. Again.

But I went back instead of shopping online for one reason: they buy used cloth diapers. Seriously. I didn't know this last time I went there, when we upgraded from Bum Genius to Fuzzi Bunz.

Can I just mention here that Fuzzi Bunz kick Bum Genius's ass? We bought Bum Genius One-Size thinking it would keep us from having to upsize as the boy grew. Nice idea, but the velcro stopped sticking and the gussets stretched out. The Fuzzi Bunz snaps have not torn out, the gussets haven't stretched. If you're comparison shopping, Fuzzi Bunz definitely wins because of their durability.

Anyway, Austin Baby! told me they'd buy back the used Bum Genius. Even with stains. Even with stretched out gussets. Even with velcro that wouldn't stick. I think we got $4 each for them. Talk about genius! I guess there are much more skillful and committed parents out there who buy the used diapers and replace the worn-out bits. More power to them, but I ain't that guy. It takes me an hour to thread the needle on the sewing machine.

I was going to buy 24 of the Medium Fuzzi Bunz at the time because that's how many Bum Genius we'd had, but they only had enough in stock for 20 if I excluded the pink ones. I felt guilty about it, but 20 instead of 24 saved us money, too, and you'll notice that I did not in the beginning make any claim of not being sexist myself. And in my defense, I did keep the lavender ones.

So when Thumper outgrew his Medium Fuzzi Bunz, I washed and packed them all up, put him in a disposable, and drove him to Hippie Central. And they bought them back! At $6 each! The new Large Fuzzi Bunz were $16.95 when bought in a lot larger than a dozen, so that $6 is a 35% discount. And no shipping costs. Since cheapness counts, it was definitely worth being a stranger in a strange land.

But how does this make Aerie sexist? The store only had 11 Large Fuzzi Bunz in stock. I wanted 20. All but one of the 11 were solid colors, with the 11th having a fuchsia floral print, which I rejected on moral grounds. There were 3 Bubble Gum, 1 Baby Pink, 1 Lavender, and the rest were Red, Sage, Butter, and White. I briefly considered rejecting the Bubble Gum and Baby Pink for not being "boy colors," but I reasoned that it would be annoying enough to get through the week with 10 diapers, let alone only 6. Plus I didn't want the lady behind the counter thinking I was a stereotypical sexist homophobe who's oppressively locking his child into prescribed gender roles and who's afraid he'll turn his boy gay if he sticks a pink diaper on his ass. Plus, they mostly don't show outside of clothes, especially when he's wearing a onesie. So I took them all.

When Aerie got home from work, she saw the diapers sitting in the laundry room waiting to be washed before wearing. She made me promise not to put the pink ones on him when we're out in public. Then she reconsidered and asked me to take the Bubble Gum and Baby Pink ones back. Then she reconsidered and added the Lavender, too. Because they're not boy colors. Can you believe that? We'll have to use more disposables this way for them to remain unused so I can trade them for different colors out of the new stock next week. So there you go. She's sexist. AND an anti-environmentalist.

In her defense, she insisted I mention that she hates pink, even for herself. She wore only black for a large portion of her adolescence. And admittedly, the Bubble Gum is pretty ugly. It's a lot closer to fuchsia than it looks in the picture. And while we did have Lavenders in the Mediums, she always disliked them. Too close to pink, I guess.

The Holidays Have Taught Him the True Meaning of the Word...

He asks me this several dozen times a day now:

Ah, January 1st

Thumper thought he'd start the new year by getting all of those firsts behind him. He peed. He pooped. He puked. He was awake at 7:00, playing patty-cake with his feet and soaked through the sheets, despite the 2 hemp liners in his diaper. After a satisfying breakfast of Kix, milk, banana and CODGE CHEEZ, we played quietly in the front room with his awesome wooden train from GUMMAS and GUMPA so as not to disturb DEDDY, who was still taking a NAP. Then, Thumper grew still, his face serious. POOP! he announced and proceeded to take care of business. Afterwards, when I suggested we go change his diaper, he countered with the recommendation that we watch POP POP and tried to saddle himself up on the computer chair. Doing so must have put a bit too much pressure on his tummy and out came the milk and CODGE CHEEZ, through both the mouth and the nose, of course. No matter, though. We cleaned it all up and did the laundry. If you have a small one and don't own a battery powered BOOGIE sucker, I highly recommend getting one.

This year, I resolve to floss more. We'll see how that goes. Resolutions? Let's face it. It doesn't matter what day of the year it is. If you make a promise to change when you're not ready to change, it ain't gonna happen. How many years did I resolve to lose weight? Oh, like every year for the last 10 years. I'd make some progress, but then stop trying and just gain it back. January 1 holds no special voodoo. It was some November day in 2007 that I was ready to commit to that promise. And 13 months later, I've dropped 37 pounds and am wearing a size I haven't been able to fit in for a decade. I still have a ways to go and I did fall off the wagon a bit during the holidays. I will get back on the right path, but not because it's a new year. Because I'm ready.

I do love New Year's Day, though. While it's not a resolution, for some reason, January 1 always seems to get me into cleaning up things and getting back on track. Thumper helped inspire me this morning. With the UCKY laundry to do and new clothes to put away, it seemed like the right time to pack away garments that don't fit him and get his room organized. He was quite cooperative most of the morning.

After our morning nap and lunch, Thumper was very enthusiastic about a bike ride with MOMMA and DEDDY which included a stop at the park to play for a spell. This was helpful in getting me back on track with exercising regularly, which has fallen a bit by the wayside recently. And it was fun. I struggle with making time to have fun. So, thank you Thumper for helping me get back on track.

Oh, and did I mention I flossed last night?