A Short Play

WINDOWS: Uh oh, you don't have all the updates you should.

RODIUS: I thought that's why I told you to do your endless updates automatically, so we wouldn't have to have this conversation several times a week.

WINDOWS: Click here!

RODIUS: Whatever. [Clicking] Is there any chance we can skip all the steps and just go to the big OK button at the end?

WINDOWS: Oh, wait. You don't have this other thing you need. You'll have to install it first. Click here!

RODIUS: [Clicking]

WINDOWS: OK, great! Now we're ready to go. Click here!

RODIUS: [Clicking]

WINDOWS: Hey, you know what you need? Service Pack 3. It's great. It's got security updates! Click here!

RODIUS: You do see how this might be a little annoying, right?

WINDOWS: It's good for you! You need it, I promise! Click here! You might want to backup your system first, though.

RODIUS: Uh, why? You're going to do it to me again, aren't you?

WINDOWS: No, no. It's just good policy. Click here!

RODIUS: [Clicking]

WINDOWS: Oh geez. Sorry. Can't restart. You really should have backed up. But you've got to admit: you're much safer this way.

RODIUS: ...

WINDOWS: Probably something wrong with your hardware or network settings. Click here to try the last known working configuration.

RODIUS: [Clicking]

WINDOWS: Uh, nope! Probably something wrong with your hardware or network settings. Safe mode'll lick it! You'll see!

RODIUS: [Clicking]

WINDOWS: See, told ya!

RODIUS: [Uninstalling Service Pack 3]

WINDOWS: I wouldn't do that. It's got security updates!